


Kloktober, Oct. 1st. “Being A Dick or Being A Dude"

by Morpheus626



Series: Lee's Kloktober 2020 [1]
Category: Metalocalypse (Cartoon)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:00:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26753218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Morpheus626/pseuds/Morpheus626
Summary: Went with ‘being a dick’ on this one!And as happens, that involves Murderface, stolen tickets, and perhaps surprisingly, Marc Summers.I am very mean to Murderface in this little drabble, but I promise I won’t be for all of Kloktober lol.TW for drugs and drug use.
Series: Lee's Kloktober 2020 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1948486
Comments: 3
Kudos: 9





	Kloktober, Oct. 1st. “Being A Dick or Being A Dude"

“Well, I’ll juscht go fuck myschelf then!” 

“I really don’t wanna hear about that,” Nathan said. “We just want an apology.” 

“And our money back!” Pickles said. “We paid for those tickets to the Magical Wonderful Sky-High Get High and Dive from the Sky Sky-Diving Event ourselves!” 

“That’s a schared bank account!” Murderface protested. 

“Doesn’t matters!” Skwisgaar shouted. “There was five tickets, but nows, there ams nones! Because you uses them all!” 

“Selfish dick,” Toki muttered.

“I am not!” 

“You are!” Pickles yelled. “You always do this, we make a nice plan, to go out and do something fun, like getting so fucking high we can’t see straight, and you find a way to ruin it!” 

“Oh, I accidentally pisch on your LSD one time! Once! And you can’t let it go!” 

“That was a lot of fuckin’ LSD, dude!” Pickles shouted desperately. “So much...so much...” 

“The point is,” Nathan growled. “You fucked up. And now you’re being a dick about it. And you were already being a dick, so this is like...double dick.” 

“Hello, I ams Marc Summers and this ams Double Dicks! Where you ams dicked down by your asshole bandmates whats ams always takings the things you love!” Toki cried. 

“Don’t you use Marc Schummers against me!” Murderface was irate. “I schould have jusct died then, huh? Fallen out of the plane, and died!” 

“You fell out of it five times!” Pickles sobbed, his head in his hands. “And we didn’t get to fall out of it once.” 

“Pickles, it’s okay,” Nathan said, and patted his back.

“Shut the fuck up, it is not okay! I was gonna do coke and LSD and weed all at once, and I was gonna fly! I was gonna be a hawk, Nathan! A hawk!” 

“How high are you right now?” 

“Really high,” Pickles mumbled. 

“You wanna go take a nap?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Okay, you go,” Nathan said, and waited until Pickles was out of the room to continue. “Look at what you did to him! To all of us!” 

“Don’t you yell at me; I hate when you fuckin’ yell at me!” Murderface’s face couldn’t get any redder. 

“Then don’t do shit that makes us yell at you!” Nathan yelled. 

“Waits,” Skwisgaar said coldly. “You didn’ts even does it, dids you?” 

“Shut the fuck up!” 

“You didn’ts,” Skwisgaar laughed bitterly. “You wents up five times, and you was a big chickens each time! I knows its!” 

“Fuck you guysch; Pickles had it right. I’m going to take a nap, because I’m exhauschted from all the fantastic sky-diving I did, and how high I was!” Murderface screeched, and stomped out of the living room towards his room. 

“Such a fucking dicks,” Toki grumbled. 

“I knows,” Skwisgaar sighed. “When wills he ever learns? Probably nevers, like a squirrel whats ams trying to cross a highways, but does not knows he should nots because he will die.” 

Nathan nodded. “He wears me the fuck out. I was looking forward to that too. Big old plane, jumpin’ out, no worries. Flying.” 

They all nodded. 

“I haves an ideas,” Toki said. 

“Yeah?” Nathan asked. 

“Wes has got money,” Toki said. “Money for a plane. And money for drugs.” 

“Toki...that ams such a good idea, I don’t believes you comes up with it,” Skwisgaar said. “Nathans...shall we?” 

“I’m gonna go get Pickles,” Nathan grinned, racing down the hall. 

“We don’ts tell Murderface though,” Toki said to Skwisgaar. 

“No?” 

Toki shook his head. “Let’s him be thinkings on how he steals our tickets, and how it makes him the worst dick to ever exist. Let’s him soak in it, until it ams so deep it ams a part of his soul.” 

“...you ams already doings cocaine, yes?” 

“Yeah,” Toki replied cheerfully. 

Nathan charged past them again and to the front door with PIckles on his heels, and they followed. 

The only other thing they had to do before getting high and in the plane, was ready the _Murderface: Worst Dick Ever For Stealing Our Shit_ banner to fly behind it, and they all had never been so glad they had so many of them printed. 


End file.
